There are days when I deeply miss my life in the Philippines. Sometimes I find myself questioning: Why did I do this? Why did I come here? Why did I need to study again?
Back home, my life was already full. I had my own house, my dog, a thriving ministry, and meaningful work that provided more than enough. I could buy what I wanted, travel where I wished, and through my role with Mennonite World Conference, I even had the privilege of seeing the world. I was surrounded by family and friends, by a community that respected and trusted me. I was a leader, someone people looked up to. In many ways, I had already built a life that was whole and complete.
So sometimes I wonder—why did I leave? Why am I here, in this place so far from everything familiar? I could have stayed close to my aging parents. I could have continued to grow in the ministry and invest in the people who depended on me. I could have pursued new ventures and opportunities back home. Yet somehow, everything that could have stopped me from coming here didn’t. My visa was approved, financial support came through, and every door opened effortlessly. That can’t be a coincidence.
So maybe, even when I don’t understand it, God has a reason. Maybe His purpose for me here is different from what I first imagined. Yes, I get lonely. Yes, I miss the freedom, the laughter, and the sense of belonging I had in the Philippines. But I believe God is doing something new in me in this place—something I can only discover through obedience and trust.
I’m learning to stop asking “Why am I here?” and start asking “What does God want to do through me here?”
And perhaps, that’s where true purpose begins.
